Post by Jim Hawkins on Mar 16, 2009 16:55:48 GMT -5
Barbossa: What are you doin'? Jack Sparrow: What are *you* doin'? Barbossa: No, what *are* you doin'? Jack Sparrow: What are *you* doin'? Barbossa: *No!* What *are* you doin'? Jack Sparrow: What are *you* doin'? Captain gives orders on the ship. Barbossa: The captain of the ship *is* givin' orders. Jack Sparrow: My ship, makes me captain. Barbossa: They be my charts! Jack Sparrow: Well, that makes you [pause] Jack Sparrow: chartman. Pintel: Stow it! Both of you! That's an order! Understand? [Jack and Barbossa stare at him] Pintel: Sorry. I just thought with the Captain issue in doubt, I'd throw my name in for consideration, sorry. Ragetti: [to Pintel] I'd vote for you.
Barbossa: Dearly Beloved, we be gathered here today... [gets attacked by a fishy-monster-DJ's crew-thingy] Barbossa: ... to nail yer gizzard to the mast, yer poxy cur!
Here are some of my faves that left me laughing so much
The Incredibles- Edna-Supermodels hah, Nothing Super about them Spoiled Stupid Little Stick Figures with Poofy Lips who think of Nothing but Themselves.
Lucius: Honey? Honey: What? Lucius: Where's my super suit? Honey: What? Lucius: Where - is - my - super - suit? Honey: I, uh, put it away. [helicopter explodes outside] Lucius: *Where*? Honey: *Why* do you *need* to know? Lucius: I need it! [Lucius rummages through another room in his condo] Honey: Uh-uh! Don't you think about running off doing no derrin'-do. We've been planning this dinner for two months! Lucius: The public is in danger! Honey: My evening's in danger! Lucius: You tell me where my suit is, woman! We are talking about the greater good! Honey: 'Greater good?' I am your wife! I'm the greatest *good* you are ever gonna get
Meet The Robinsons-
Wilbur: Pop quiz: Who have you met, and what have you learned? Lewis: OK. Bud, Fritz, and Joe are brothers. Fritz is married to Petunia, and is she...? [Makes a talking gesture with his hand] Wilbur: Cranky? Yes. Lewis: Tallulah and Laszlo are their children. Joe is married to Billie. Lefty is the butler. Spike and Dimitri are twins, and I don't know who they're related to. Wilbur: Neither do we. Go on. Lewis: Lucille is married to Bud, and your dad, Cornelius, is their son. What does Cornelius look like? Wilbur: Tom Selleck. Lewis: OK. Cornelius is married to Franny, and her brothers are Gaston and Art. Wilbur: You're forgetting something. Lewis: Forgetting? Oh, right! Wilbur is the son of Franny and Cornelius. Wilbur: And nobody realized that you're from the past? Lewis: Nope. Wilbur: Whew. Lewis: Thank you. Thank you. Hold your applause
Lucille Krunklehorn: Nope, I have the caffeine patch. It's my invention. Each patch is the equivalent of 12 cups of coffee. You can stay up for days with no side effects. Ahhh! Sorry.
Lilo and Stitch- Jumba: Come on, what's the big deal? Stitch: [in alien language] Oongatish mista! Jumba: I'll put you back together again... I'll make you taller, and not so fluffy! [whips plates at Stitch, frisbee style] Stitch: I like fluffy! [after there is a ring of holes around Stitch] Stitch: [in alien language] Ah, Pooama Chicky! Jumba: Ach! Leave my mother out of this
Stitch: Merry Christmas. Jumba: It's not Christmas. Stitch: Happy Channukah! Jumba: It's not Channukah! [Pleakley scoops up Lilo and carries her away from the house] Lilo: We're leaving Stitch? Pleakley: Trust me, this is not gonna end well! Jumba: One potato! Stitch: Two potato! Jumba: Three potato! Stitch: Four! Jumba: Five potato! Stitch: Six potato! Jumba: Seven potato more! Stitch: My... Jumba: mother... Stitch: told... Jumba: me... Stitch: you... Jumba: are... Stitch: ...the best. Jumba: Ha! I win! [gun explodes in his hands]
Pleakley: Look! A mosquito has chosen me as her perch. She's so beautiful. Look, another one! And another one! Why, it's a whole flock! They like me! They're nuzzling my flesh with their noses! Now they're... they're... Aaaaaaaah!
Nani-GO TO YOUR ROOOOOOOOMM Lilo-I'M ALREADY IN MY ROOM
And of Course possibly my favorite funny quote from Sky High
Principal Powers: What a waste. I can't do anything more to help you. I'm not Wonder Woman, you know. [walks out of the detention room, leaving Gwen/Royal Pain and the others locked inside] Gwen: I went through puberty twice - for *this*?
These lovely artwork are made by my Apprentice Miss Nani Pelekai Thanks Darling Seen hanging with Chicken Little and Stitch
Post by Jim Hawkins on Mar 16, 2009 17:20:39 GMT -5
Even more from Pirates 3. When I first saw this movie, I had no idea what happened. I was laughing too hard.
[Scarlett and Giselle are fighting, Jack watches the Pearl sail away] Jack Sparrow: Ladies, will you please shut it! Listen to me. [to Giselle] Jack Sparrow: Yes, I lied to you. [to Scarlett] Jack Sparrow: No, I don't love you. [to Giselle] Jack Sparrow: Of course it makes you look fat. [to Scarlett] Jack Sparrow: I've never been to Brussels. [to Giselle] Jack Sparrow: It is pronounced *egregious*. [to Scarlett] Jack Sparrow: By the way, no. I've never actually met Pizarro, but I love his pies. [to both] Jack Sparrow: And all of this pales to utter insignificance in light of the fact that my ship is once again gone. Savvy? [Giselle slaps him, Scarlett slaps him, he slaps Gibbs]
Lord Cutler Beckett: You're mad. Jack Sparrow: Thank goodness for that, 'cause if I wasn't this would probably never work. [catapults himself onto his ship landing safely on his feet behind his crew] Jack Sparrow: And that was without even a single drop of rum!
Jack Sparrow: ((about Will)) Think like the whelp. Think like the whelp... Think like the whelp...
Jack Sparrow: You may throw my hat if you wish. [Gibbs throws Jack's hat, cheering] Jack Sparrow: Now go and get it. [Gibs wipes the smile off his face]
Sumbhajee: [in possibly the most high-pitched voice imaginable] And so... we shall go to war!